Simultaneous orgasm refers to the couple climaxing at the same time. If you are a fan of Hollywood romances then you could be mistaken for assuming simultaneous orgasm is the norm. In fact, a lot of people think that a male and a female are supposed to reach orgasm at the same moment, every single time. In the real world, this just isn't true.
The medical facts
While simultaneous orgasms are nice, they are difficult to achieve, especially when you're young.
They are more likely to occur in a close and loving relationship, where the partners have been together for years and know each other's sexual responses well.
Co-ordinated climaxes are unlikely to happen during a 'one-night stand' or even during a brief affair, unless both people know a lot about skillful sexual stimulation.
It also helps if the man has good control of his own ejaculation, which is not very common among younger men.
How to achieve simultaneous orgasm?
For many couples simultaneous orgasm is not going to happen, at least not on a regular basis, and it’s accepted as something that is no big deal.
But if you really want to 'come' in the same instant as your partner, it can be done.
Here' a guide to help you:
1. Learn how to ensure that the female partner can orgasm more or less at will, during sexual intercourse.
Since men tend to climax faster than women this usually means giving the woman a head start achievable through plenty of foreplay. Most women need 10 to 20 minutes to peak via intercourse, whereas most men need just 2 minutes.
If you work at it over a period of time, in a loving, romantic, unhurried atmosphere, this can be quite easy to achieve. Simply try and make sure that you can reach the woman's clitoris, with your fingertips during intercourse and when you're both nearly ready to 'come', rub it gently but enthusiastically.
2. Exploit multiple orgasms.
If the female partner has learned how to have multiple orgasms, that makes the objective of simultaneous orgasm much easier. So, if he isn't ready to climax by the first time she comes, he can always do it when she orgasms for the second, third or fourth time.
3. Make sure that the man learns to control the timing of his orgasms.
Honestly, this might take years to do. But there's a healthy tendency for men to learn more control as they get older.
If the man feels he is about to ‘come’ too soon, he can briefly pull-out. The woman can also gently squeeze the tip of the man’s penis for 5 seconds to halt blood flow and abate arousal to slow an impending orgasm. A gentle pull on the testicles can achieve the same effect.
What does this mean for couples?
Simultaneous orgasms are not that common, especially amongst younger people. So try not to make a 'big deal' of them. But if you and your partner really want simultaneous orgasms, they can be achieved. They simply require a lot of work and determination.